From your job?
From your spouse?
From your life?
Just chuck it? Start over?
I think from time to time, we all do. Maybe we're not so serious that we want to end it all, but just start over. Look back, see that things just didn't go the way we planned, and get a do over.
Start anew. With no regrets, no debts, no baggage.
Is there a way to do that without throwing in the towel?
I think the reason we feel like this is because we accept too many obligations and then feel bad about not being able to meet them all.
We say “yes” to everything, and all those little things add up to the point where things begin to crack.
And then we start a slow downward spiral. It may take weeks or months. Most often, though, the slide is so insidious that it takes years to hit bottom.
Today, I want you to start saying “No.” There's a book out by one of my favorite writers called “The Power of No.” In it, James talks of the power of saying no. Saying “No” can open the door to saying “Yes” to your life.
Because that's just it — we stop living for ourselves and instead live for other things: other people, other obligations, and other reasons.
Maybe it's the house payment. “Well, I can't take a vacation because the mortgage is coming due.”
The mortgage will be coming due for years, buddy, and you need a vacay.
So if you don't take it now, when will you?
There's a metaphor I like to use to imagine what my life looks like. Or what it looked like, until I reprioritized my life into more manageable chunks.
My life was a big punch bowl, filled to the brim with obligations, to-do lists a mile long, and commitments I'd made over many years.
At first, it was all manageable. I kept saying “Yes.” The payoff seemed to be worth the sacrifice.
But I couldn't drink the punch fast enough. I soon began using Dixie cups to bale out punch and just throw it away.
Mind you, the punch didn't vanish. I literally began chucking it from the bowl. I did that with friendships, commitments, and obligations.
I was in base survival mode. I had to pay the rent, buy groceries, make the car payment.
I did what I had to do. But I lost a lot along the way, simply because I kept racking up the obligations.
I was writing checks my ass couldn't pay.
The punch bowl was now furiously spilling over. At first, a couple drips, then a stream, then a gusher.
Until you reach that point, that punch bowl sure looks like fun.
Until it isn't.
Then one day, and it's inevitable, you will just tip that goddamn punch bowl over, slam it to the ground, and maybe sweep up the broken glass and dump it in the trash.
If you're a fan of insanity, you'll buy another punch bowl and start filling it up.
Buy your self a bag of Dixie cups. Set 5 up:
- Your critical financial obligations
- Your business or job
- Your family
Let 'em fill up. Once they are filled to the brim, STOP. Just say “No.” Don't take on anything else until you empty those cups.
Now, you should never have an empty “YOU” cup, or family cup. But you should endeavor to keep those other cups as empty as possible, on average. Sure, they'll fill up, you'll work your ass off to empty them, and then they'll fill up again.
Empty. Fill. Empty.
That's your SOP (standard operating procedure) now.
Want to empty #1? Sell your house. Seriously. Being a homeowner is one of the most stressful things in the world. Lose your job, miss a few payments and your house can be taken away from you. Legally.
Because you don't own it. The bank does. And they don't give a rip about YOU, your family, or your “Other.”
Sell your third car. You get rid of not only the payment, but the insurance and registration.
Stop buying shit you won't use. Go to your JVZoo account. See all that crap you bought?
Are you using even 10 percent of it? If you are, congratulations. You are one of the few.
You say “Yes” to too many things. But there's another issue:
You don't know how to prioritize. You don't know how to manage your obligations.
And you can't manage time. It manages you.
You can only manage your tasks.
Everything, by the way, is a project. And projects are just tasks strung together until a logical “completion” takes place.
In short, you're not productive.
You get bogged down.
You suffer from analysis paralysis.
I want to show you how to get unstuck.
Are you with me?
Stay tuned. Watch your email.
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